A Sign of God's Love...

Dear Sisters,

I’ve had a rough time getting an email off this week, but I haven’t forgotten you. :)

As we interviewed most of you concerning visiting teaching last month, I asked many of you: “Why you do your visiting teaching?”  As I listened to your reply, I was reminded several time of how Adam responded when the angel asked him why he offered sacrifices.  He responded:

“I know not, save the Lord commanded me.”

And then the Angel proceeded to explain that,

“This thing is a similitude of the sacrifice of the Only Begotten of the Father, which is full of grace and truth.”

 (Pearl of Great Price, Moses 5:6-7)

Sometimes we do things in an effort to be obedient without understanding why, and what a wonderful place to begin!  However, I hope that you search your hearts for a deeper understanding, so that your testimony of Visiting Teaching can begin to grow. 

I am going to break a little bit from a traditional message and share some personal thoughts from my own precious sisters.  They are amazing ladies, and I actually asked them that same "Why" question in a group text.  I thought their experiences were inspiring, and hope that in sharing them, perhaps you will identify or feel encouraged.  (I apologize for the length. If you can’t read it all, at least read the underlined bits.)

My Precious Sister-in-Law:

I have to admit visiting teaching has never been easy for me and I don't necessarily love it. I often get assigned to people I wouldn't naturally enter into a close friendship with, who are struggling, or who are impossible to schedule with. So I can see why some sisters can get discouraged or struggle with it because sometimes it is hard. However, I do have a testimony of it and that's what keeps me going.

I see the visiting teaching program as a sign that God loves us so much that he doesn't want us to feel alone, friendless, or desperate especially in darkest hours.  Visiting teachers are entitled to receive revelation on how to best help the ladies they are over and in that sense it's a way that the Lord can minister to his children's needs. It's really a beautiful thing.

Currently, in my new ward, I have felt lonely. I have been here four months with no sign of visiting teachers or even a visiting teaching assignment, even though I have asked. I contrast this somewhat friendless time in my life, with my time in Ohio when my visiting teachers made such an effort to be true friends to me, and I can't help but think what a difference that would make in my life right now. I am fairly independent and can manage fine and keep busy and my testimony is strong, but what if I were someone in this new ward with no friends, dealing with something tragic or with illness or a wavering testimony? The Lord doesn't want anyone to slip through the cracks.

I also think of the sweet experiences I had in Ohio with the three ladies I visit taught. One was a sweet sister who's husband was a very busy plastic surgeon resident with three little kids. She really needed the support of her friends and visiting teachers. And everything I tried to go out of my way to do for her seemed to mean so much to her.

Another sister was a convert from Cameroon, with a heavy accent.  She hadn't been to church in ten years because of her job. We were her only contact with the ward, really. When she was able to switch jobs and start coming to church again, she at least knew my partner and I, and when she and her husband were able to receive their endowments and be sealed in the temple, my companion and I were able to go through right by her side.

The third sister was a single lady who was forty and had a bipolar disorder. When I became her visiting teacher, she was a mess. She was just about to get knee surgery and was struggling financially and trying to finish nursing school while working full time. She needed food, rides everywhere, her garbage taken out, her guinea pigs cages cleaned, her ice machine for her knee changed, and most of all, moral support. I organized everything and stopped by her house at least once a day and gave her many rides. I often had a bad attitude about it, but it made such a difference in her life. Over the two years I was her visiting teacher, she struggled with many things and was often almost suicidal. She was often crying on our couch, getting blessings from from my husband, or sleeping in our basement. I expected our relationship to be one sided and a bit of an emotional drain for me.  There were times at first when it was, but I was surprised when it developed into a true and deep friendship that was far from one sided. She became very close with my little daughter, and she would often invite me to movies or to grab a piece of cake at a bakery or to the zoo. And when I was alone in Ohio while my husband was driving the moving truck across the country, who do you think was there helping me clean, bringing me treats, and keeping me company?

I learned so much from these three ladies about the Lord’s love for his children through them. We often think of visiting teaching as one sided, but many time it was the people I taught who were there for me in times of need. I was far from perfect at doing an official message each month, but I tried to focus on their needs, even though they were all so different, and as I did, I could really feel the Lord’s love for them and for me through visiting teaching.

It is so nice to simply not feel invisible. The small things we can do to help the people we teach not feel invisible or alone can make a huge difference, even if they don't physically or emotionally seem to need help. It made me feel so good when one of my visiting teachers decorated my door the night before my birthday!

Striving to have the spirit is the key. One lady I taught years ago never seemed to need anything and always seemed happy. We didn't have the deepest connection, but we were still friends. One time when I had to do the visiting alone, I felt prompted to say "I know you never need anything from me, but is there anything you just need to talk to someone about or to vent about?" And she broke down crying and told me all about her infertility struggles. I'm not sure that I had much to say in return, but later she told me how much had needed to just say it all out loud to someone. The spirit can help us, but I think we become more entitled to that revelation if we are consistently trying to befriend them and visit our sisters.

My Amazing Baby Sister: 

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I have struggled with visiting teaching and I still do sometimes, just because I'm not the best conversationalist,  I don't anyways feel like the women "need" me (they're already so put together) and truthfully I'm exhausted with my calling and being a mom to smalls. It's sometimes tough for me to ask "can I take your little rambunctious two year old for you so you can have a break?" when I already have one of my own plus three more. And sometimes it's hard to give a real spiritually uplifting thought when I'm trying to calm my son who is screaming and crawling up my body because he's terrified of the giant dog sitting in the couch, :) Or I know my baby needs a nap and we've been visiting for two hours, and I go home thinking I was just a warm body in the room.

I'm sounding like a downer and I don't mean to be, but I'm just saying "I get it." Sometimes we might feel like it's a waste of time. BUT then I remember the times where having visiting teachers come to visit me and get to know me has meant the world to me. When I first moved to here, I was so intensely lonely. Technically I was fine, I was busy with a new baby and I didn't HAVE to have someone to talk to, but boy, it would have been nice. 

Last year, I got a visiting teacher who tried so hard to be thoughtful. She would drive by the house and notice me unloading groceries and she would stop to help me. She was one of the only ward members at the time who I felt brave enough to tell about my blog.  And she looked at it regularly and encouraged me. She even looked to see my list of "favorites treats" and she brought them to me on my birthday. They were just little things but I felt like I actually had a friend who cared about me.

I have to think of those things and pray for small things within my limited capacity that I can do for the women I visit teach, even if it's just saying something kind. I remind myself that it means a lot to me to have someone come to my house and care about me; maybe it would mean something to them.

Whether the situations end in a positive experience or not, all women have a chance to become more Christ-like, with an opportunity to stretch and grow. I guess that's what I've always fallen back on. Whether I make a friend or not, I know that it's giving me the opportunity to do what Christ would do.

_____

My other sister-in-law suggested that “a big part of visiting teaching is just knowing who you teach and knowing who teaches you. It would be great if we could get rid of the guilt that comes with not being a perfect visiting teacher or getting the "right numbers".”

My hope is that we can all begin to see visiting teaching as a sign of God’s love for his daughters, and an opportunity to become more like our Savior.

I love you sisters!  Hope you have a Happy Halloween! Don’t eat too much candy. ;)

Sincerely, 

Lydia 

Making the Sabbath a Delight

Hello Sisters!

Happy Fall!  Isn’t it glorious?!  I love this season so much that I couldn’t help but name my daughter Autumn.  We took a family drive up the canyon today and the colors were breathtaking.  

It was the first time in a while that I felt like the Sabbath really was a delight for me.  Don’t get me wrong, I always enjoy Sundays.  I love mingling with good people like you, learning about the gospel, and especially being able to take the sacrament, but that Sunday drive felt good, and delighting in Heavenly Father’s glorious creations as a family felt like an extraordinary opportunity that broke from the routine.

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“The Sabbath is His gift to us, granting real respite from the rigors of daily life and an opportunity for spiritual and physical renewal. God gave us this special day, not for amusement or daily labor but for a rest from duty, with physical and spiritual relief.”

In recent ward council meetings, our General Authorities trained us on Sabbath Day observance at home and during our meetings.  Their hope is that we will share what we learned and try to set an example.  It is something I have been working on and thinking a lot about.  Elder Nelson’s talk "The Sabbath is a Delight" is a great reference.  He said:

“My conduct and my attitude on the Sabbath constituted a sign between me and my Heavenly Father. With that understanding, I no longer needed lists of dos and don’ts. When I had to make a decision whether or not an activity was appropriate for the Sabbath, I simply asked myself, “What sign do I want to give to God? That question made my choices about the Sabbath day crystal clear."

We often hear the phrase “Show me a sign?!” usually uttered to the skies, but have you ever thought God might like to see some action from us?  So much so that he offers us an entire day for to demonstrate our love?  Isn’t it neat to think that what we choose to do on Sunday can reveal to our Heavenly Father who we are or what is in our hearts?  It almost acts as a covenant or contract of our love and commitment.  I think looking at it that way might make it easier to keep the Sabbath Day holy, which IS a commandment, by the way. :)

“Faith in God engenders a love for the Sabbath; faith in the Sabbath engenders a love for God.”

Somehow, it always comes back to faith.  As I mentioned, delighting in the Sabbath Day is something I am working on.  I would like to challenge you to work on it with me.  Maybe together, we can think of new “signs” of our love and obedience that we can offer the Lord on His special day.

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I love you sisters and hope you find some time this week to "be still" and enjoy the beautiful world around you!

Sincerely,

Lydia

Distinct and Different in Happy Ways!

Dear Sisters,

Do you realize how precious you are?  Do you recognize the vital part you play in preparing the world for the second coming of the Lord?  Our lesson today was on Leadership, and I couldn’t help but think of this quote by Elder Packer:

“We need women who are organized and women who can organize. We need women with executive ability who can plan and direct and administer; women who can teach, women who can speak out. …

“We need women with the gift of discernment who can view the trends in the world and detect those that, however popular, are shallow or dangerous.”

Tonight, I would like to echo Elder Nelson’s words from his most recent talk, “A Plea to My Sisters.”  This is a talk I urge each of you to familiarize yourselves with—I would very much like to quote the entire talk… in fact I did, and then I had to painfully edit and re-edit. Brevity is not one of my strong suits.  

He quoted a prophecy President Kimball made over 30 years ago.

“Much of the major growth that is coming to the Church in the last days will come because many of the good women of the world … will be drawn to the Church in large numbers. This will happen to the degree that the women of the Church reflect righteousness and articulateness in their lives and to the degree that the women of the Church are seen as distinct and different—in happy ways—from the women of the world.”

 

Elder Nelson exclaimed that we are the women he foresaw!  Do you think of yourself as distinct and different in happy ways?  I absolutely love that idea and the reminder that we need to stand out and “lighten up.”  The Gospel should be bringing you joy!  

“I wonder if we as Church members might benefit from asking ourselves from time to time: “Is my experience in the Church working for me? Is it bringing me closer to Christ? Is it blessing me and my family with peace and joy as promised in the gospel?” (Elder Uchtdorf)

If we are not feeling joy in the gospel, Elder Uchtdorf urges us to “simply” and “start where we are.” 

“God will take you as you are at this very moment and begin to work with you. All you need is a willing heart, a desire to believe, and trust in the Lord.”

“Today, we need women who know how to make important things happen by their faith and who are courageous defenders of morality and families in a sin-sick world.

 

I pray each of you will do your part to fulfill President Kimball’s prophecy. Elder Nelson promises that as we do, “the Holy Ghost will magnify your influence in an unprecedented way!”

Start where you are!

Sincerely,

Lydia

Faith is like a Little Seed. If Planted it Will Grow!

Dear Sisters-

What a spiritual feast!  Wasn’t General Conference wonderful?  I have a lot to study and “ponderize”.  We have such inspired leaders!  My son, Seth, was so excited when he saw those beautiful children singing in the Saturday Afternoon Session.  He said, “Finally!  A Child Conference that I have been waiting for all my life!!!” J

I literally planted bulbs and pansies all day yesterday.  I couldn’t sleep last night because my arms and back were so sore.  I am kind of the “pansy,” really. J  While I was whining to my husband about how hard it all was, he smiled at me and said, “Planting bulbs and pansies really is a faith based work, isn’t it?” I am really hoping it will be worth that effort in the Spring. J

My thought this week is simple and probably familiar, but fit in nicely with my planting adventures.  I was so happy this morning to see all the moisture we received, just after all my hard work yesterday.  It made me feel like the Lord was meeting me half way by opening the heavens.  Some of those pansies seemed so limp and dry, like they weren’t going to make it, but they have perked right up with the rain.

Do you recall what Alma taught us about faith and planting seeds? (Alma 32)

26 Now, as I said concerning faith—that it was not a perfect knowledge—even so it is with my words. Ye cannot know of their surety at first, unto perfection, any more than faith is a perfect knowledge.

 27 But behold, if ye will awake and arouse your faculties, even to an experiment upon my words, and exercise a particle of faith, yea, even if ye can no more than desire to believe, let this desire work in you, even until ye believe in a manner that ye can give place for a portion of my words.

 28 Now, we will compare the word unto a seed. Now, if ye give place, that a seed may be planted in your heart, behold, if it be a true seed, or a good seed, if ye do not cast it out by your unbelief, that ye will resist the Spirit of the Lord, behold, it will begin to swell within your breasts; and when you feel these swelling motions, ye will begin to say within yourselves—It must needs be that this is a good seed, or that the word is good, for it beginneth to enlarge my soul; yea, it beginneth to enlighten my understanding, yea, it beginneth to be delicious to me.

 29 Now behold, would not this increase your faith? I say unto you, Yea; nevertheless it hath not grown up to a perfect knowledge.

 30 But behold, as the seed swelleth, and sprouteth, and beginneth to grow, then you must needs say that the seed is good; for behold it swelleth, and sprouteth, and beginneth to grow. And now, behold, will not this strengthen your faith? Yea, it will strengthen your faith: for ye will say I know that this is a good seed; for behold it sprouteth and beginneth to grow.

 31 And now, behold, are ye sure that this is a good seed? I say unto you, Yea; for every seed bringeth forth unto its own likeness.

Now for the connection:  We have heard some powerful words from living witnesses of Christ this last weekend.  

I testify that as we act in faith, experimenting on their words, and plant those seeds deep in our hearts, the Lord will allow our testimonies to flourish and our faith to increase, until we can know that what they say is true, eventually with a perfect knowledge. (That will be the pretty flowers that come up in the springtime. J)

I urge each of us to give a place for those conference messages in our heart.

I love you sisters.  You fill my thoughts and prayers.  I desire happiness and strong faith for each of you!

Sincerely,

Lydia