An Influence for Good

Dear Sisters,

I sat in sacrament meeting today, and couldn't help but notice a cute little girl in front of me watching her mother closely.  As her mother crossed her legs, so did she.  As her mother ran her fingers through her hair, so did she.  As her mother took the sacrament, so did she.  It made me smile.  Then I noticed a little later a young boy watching his Grandma.  His eyes were full of love and admiration, and he gently rested his head on her shoulder.  These two images touched me.  This quote from Elder Uchtdorf came to mind:

"I hope that my dear sisters throughout the world—grandmothers, mothers, aunts, and friends—never underestimate the power of their influence for good, especially in the lives of our precious children and youth!"

President Heber J. Grant (1856–1945) said, “Without the devotion and absolute testimony of the living God in the hearts of our mothers, this Church would die.”  And the writer of Proverbs said, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6).

President Gordon B. Hinckley counseled the women of the Church:

“It is so tremendously important that the women of the Church stand strong and immovable for that which is correct and proper under the plan of the Lord. …

“We call upon the women of the Church to stand together for righteousness. They must begin in their own homes. They can teach it in their classes. They can voice it in their communities.” ²

Never under estimate the power of your influence!  Your children, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, and friends are watching you.  Be an influence for good.  Be an example of the believers.  Be a source of light and truth for them.  Don't be afraid to share your testimony with them.  They are watching you, and need your example of faith.

Find someone you can influence for good this week!

Sincerely,

Lydia

A Tremendous Force for Good

Dear Sisters,

Happy Spring!  What a lovely week full of sunshine and springtime smells!  I hope you found a minute to get outside and soak it in!

I read a quote by President Hinckley that keeps running through my head from Marlene’s lesson today.  I felt some of you sisters need to hear it, in case you missed it.

“No one can calculate the tremendous force for good that you can become. … I charge you to stand tall and be strong in defense of those great virtues which have been the backbone of our social progress. When you are united, your power is limitless. You can accomplish anything you wish to accomplish. And oh, how very, very great is the need for you in a world of crumbling values where the adversary seems so very much to be in control.

I feel to invite women everywhere to rise to the great potential within you. I do not ask that you reach beyond your capacity. I hope you will not nag yourselves with thoughts of failure. I hope you will not try to set goals far beyond your capacity to achieve. I hope you will simply do what you can do in the best way you know. If you do so, you will witness miracles come to pass.

You really are remarkable.  Remember that yours is “the errand of angels.”

“If you live up to your privileges, the angels cannot be restrained from being your associates.” (Joseph Smith)

The Lord loves you, you are of great worth to him. You make a difference!

I hope you have a wonderful week and remember your divine worth.

-Lydia

"A Charity Case"

Dear Sisters,

The summer is passing by too quickly!  Hope you are enjoying the sunshine and fun family activities.

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I recently heard a sister say she didn’t want meals or visits because she didn’t want to be known as “a charity case.”  I understood what she was trying to say and I admired her desire to be self-reliant, however as I have since pondered on what it means to have charity, I believe there are lessons for all of us, both on the giving and receiving end of charity.  I’m sure these scriptures in Moroni 7 is familiar to you:

 45 And charity suffereth long, and is kind, and envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil, and rejoiceth not in iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

 46 Wherefore, my beloved brethren, if ye have not charity, ye are nothing, for charity never faileth. Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all, for all things must fail—

 47 But charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him.

Take a moment to ponder the attributes of charity and see how you are doing.  Consider, with those beautiful verses of scripture in mind, that perhaps it isn’t such a bad thing to be “a charity case.”  Shouldn’t we all desire to either give or relieve the pure love of Christ?  If you are in need of charity or service of some kind, please don’t deny someone the opportunity to share or show Christ’s pure love by serving you.  They may need it just as much as you.  We are stronger when we are loving and serving each other.

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This was illustrated in my own life just this last week.  I had to meet for a full day curriculum planning.  I had made arrangements for my kids, but they fell through.  Feeling troubled about what to do regarding childcare, I said a simple prayer that things would work out, and then I started cleaning up the kitchen… because that was something I can always do. ;)  When I took the trash out, I heard a voice say “Hey Sis!  How are you doing?”  I looked up to see sweet Peggy Blaylock peaking out of her bedroom window.  We exchanged hellos and then she said, “I was wondering if you would let me take your kids tomorrow.  I would love to take them to the family history center jubilee.”  I hadn’t even said a word about needing help.  Tears filled my eyes as the knowledge of the Saviors love washed over me.  He was aware of me and my needs, and I was so touched that Peggy was in-tune enough to know just what I needed at that moment.  Her sweet act of charity truly allowed me to feel that pure love of Christ.

Sisters, our inspired Relief Society moto of ‘Charity never faileth’ is truly one to live by, and “it will be well with us” if we do.  We all need to give and receive the pure love of Christ.  In my book, it’s ok to be known as “a charity case.” J

Sincerely,

Lydia

Love in Action...

Dear Sisters,

Isn’t it wonderful to be part of this amazing “Worldwide Circle of Sisterhood"?!  I have just been pondering on Kathy Hughes’ powerful lesson yesterday, and have felt so richly blessed to be a part of this Relief Society organization.  Our motto “Charity Never Faileth” is such an inspiring theme to live by.  

It makes me think of you...

I loved President Monson’s quote on charity toward the end of the lesson:

“I have in mind the charity that manifests itself when we are tolerant of others and lenient toward their actions, the kind of charity that forgives, the kind of charity that is patient.

“I have in mind the charity that impels us to be sympathetic, compassionate, and merciful, not only in times of sickness and affliction and distress but also in times of weakness or error on the part of others.

“There is a serious need for the charity that gives attention to those who are unnoticed, hope to those who are discouraged, aid to those who are afflicted. True charity is love in action. The need for charity is everywhere.”

Isn’t that a beautiful reminder?  I think most of us are considerably compassionate when physical needs arise, but there is a tremendous need for tolerance, patience, and forgiveness when someone messes up.  It is so good for us to look beyond ourselves and “expand our sphere of influence”.  As we do, I feel confident that our divine nature, who we truly are, will become clearer to us.

“Looking out through a window, not just into a mirror, allows us to see ourselves as His.” (Rosemary M. Wixom)

Reach out to the people around you.  Take a moment to exercise charity—“love in action”, and make contact with those you visit teach this week.  I really believe that you woman can “change the world.”  You have certainly made mine better!  I love you dearly for it!  Hope you have a lovely week.

Sincerely,

Lydia

A Sign of God's Love...

Dear Sisters,

I’ve had a rough time getting an email off this week, but I haven’t forgotten you. :)

As we interviewed most of you concerning visiting teaching last month, I asked many of you: “Why you do your visiting teaching?”  As I listened to your reply, I was reminded several time of how Adam responded when the angel asked him why he offered sacrifices.  He responded:

“I know not, save the Lord commanded me.”

And then the Angel proceeded to explain that,

“This thing is a similitude of the sacrifice of the Only Begotten of the Father, which is full of grace and truth.”

 (Pearl of Great Price, Moses 5:6-7)

Sometimes we do things in an effort to be obedient without understanding why, and what a wonderful place to begin!  However, I hope that you search your hearts for a deeper understanding, so that your testimony of Visiting Teaching can begin to grow. 

I am going to break a little bit from a traditional message and share some personal thoughts from my own precious sisters.  They are amazing ladies, and I actually asked them that same "Why" question in a group text.  I thought their experiences were inspiring, and hope that in sharing them, perhaps you will identify or feel encouraged.  (I apologize for the length. If you can’t read it all, at least read the underlined bits.)

My Precious Sister-in-Law:

I have to admit visiting teaching has never been easy for me and I don't necessarily love it. I often get assigned to people I wouldn't naturally enter into a close friendship with, who are struggling, or who are impossible to schedule with. So I can see why some sisters can get discouraged or struggle with it because sometimes it is hard. However, I do have a testimony of it and that's what keeps me going.

I see the visiting teaching program as a sign that God loves us so much that he doesn't want us to feel alone, friendless, or desperate especially in darkest hours.  Visiting teachers are entitled to receive revelation on how to best help the ladies they are over and in that sense it's a way that the Lord can minister to his children's needs. It's really a beautiful thing.

Currently, in my new ward, I have felt lonely. I have been here four months with no sign of visiting teachers or even a visiting teaching assignment, even though I have asked. I contrast this somewhat friendless time in my life, with my time in Ohio when my visiting teachers made such an effort to be true friends to me, and I can't help but think what a difference that would make in my life right now. I am fairly independent and can manage fine and keep busy and my testimony is strong, but what if I were someone in this new ward with no friends, dealing with something tragic or with illness or a wavering testimony? The Lord doesn't want anyone to slip through the cracks.

I also think of the sweet experiences I had in Ohio with the three ladies I visit taught. One was a sweet sister who's husband was a very busy plastic surgeon resident with three little kids. She really needed the support of her friends and visiting teachers. And everything I tried to go out of my way to do for her seemed to mean so much to her.

Another sister was a convert from Cameroon, with a heavy accent.  She hadn't been to church in ten years because of her job. We were her only contact with the ward, really. When she was able to switch jobs and start coming to church again, she at least knew my partner and I, and when she and her husband were able to receive their endowments and be sealed in the temple, my companion and I were able to go through right by her side.

The third sister was a single lady who was forty and had a bipolar disorder. When I became her visiting teacher, she was a mess. She was just about to get knee surgery and was struggling financially and trying to finish nursing school while working full time. She needed food, rides everywhere, her garbage taken out, her guinea pigs cages cleaned, her ice machine for her knee changed, and most of all, moral support. I organized everything and stopped by her house at least once a day and gave her many rides. I often had a bad attitude about it, but it made such a difference in her life. Over the two years I was her visiting teacher, she struggled with many things and was often almost suicidal. She was often crying on our couch, getting blessings from from my husband, or sleeping in our basement. I expected our relationship to be one sided and a bit of an emotional drain for me.  There were times at first when it was, but I was surprised when it developed into a true and deep friendship that was far from one sided. She became very close with my little daughter, and she would often invite me to movies or to grab a piece of cake at a bakery or to the zoo. And when I was alone in Ohio while my husband was driving the moving truck across the country, who do you think was there helping me clean, bringing me treats, and keeping me company?

I learned so much from these three ladies about the Lord’s love for his children through them. We often think of visiting teaching as one sided, but many time it was the people I taught who were there for me in times of need. I was far from perfect at doing an official message each month, but I tried to focus on their needs, even though they were all so different, and as I did, I could really feel the Lord’s love for them and for me through visiting teaching.

It is so nice to simply not feel invisible. The small things we can do to help the people we teach not feel invisible or alone can make a huge difference, even if they don't physically or emotionally seem to need help. It made me feel so good when one of my visiting teachers decorated my door the night before my birthday!

Striving to have the spirit is the key. One lady I taught years ago never seemed to need anything and always seemed happy. We didn't have the deepest connection, but we were still friends. One time when I had to do the visiting alone, I felt prompted to say "I know you never need anything from me, but is there anything you just need to talk to someone about or to vent about?" And she broke down crying and told me all about her infertility struggles. I'm not sure that I had much to say in return, but later she told me how much had needed to just say it all out loud to someone. The spirit can help us, but I think we become more entitled to that revelation if we are consistently trying to befriend them and visit our sisters.

My Amazing Baby Sister: 

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I have struggled with visiting teaching and I still do sometimes, just because I'm not the best conversationalist,  I don't anyways feel like the women "need" me (they're already so put together) and truthfully I'm exhausted with my calling and being a mom to smalls. It's sometimes tough for me to ask "can I take your little rambunctious two year old for you so you can have a break?" when I already have one of my own plus three more. And sometimes it's hard to give a real spiritually uplifting thought when I'm trying to calm my son who is screaming and crawling up my body because he's terrified of the giant dog sitting in the couch, :) Or I know my baby needs a nap and we've been visiting for two hours, and I go home thinking I was just a warm body in the room.

I'm sounding like a downer and I don't mean to be, but I'm just saying "I get it." Sometimes we might feel like it's a waste of time. BUT then I remember the times where having visiting teachers come to visit me and get to know me has meant the world to me. When I first moved to here, I was so intensely lonely. Technically I was fine, I was busy with a new baby and I didn't HAVE to have someone to talk to, but boy, it would have been nice. 

Last year, I got a visiting teacher who tried so hard to be thoughtful. She would drive by the house and notice me unloading groceries and she would stop to help me. She was one of the only ward members at the time who I felt brave enough to tell about my blog.  And she looked at it regularly and encouraged me. She even looked to see my list of "favorites treats" and she brought them to me on my birthday. They were just little things but I felt like I actually had a friend who cared about me.

I have to think of those things and pray for small things within my limited capacity that I can do for the women I visit teach, even if it's just saying something kind. I remind myself that it means a lot to me to have someone come to my house and care about me; maybe it would mean something to them.

Whether the situations end in a positive experience or not, all women have a chance to become more Christ-like, with an opportunity to stretch and grow. I guess that's what I've always fallen back on. Whether I make a friend or not, I know that it's giving me the opportunity to do what Christ would do.

_____

My other sister-in-law suggested that “a big part of visiting teaching is just knowing who you teach and knowing who teaches you. It would be great if we could get rid of the guilt that comes with not being a perfect visiting teacher or getting the "right numbers".”

My hope is that we can all begin to see visiting teaching as a sign of God’s love for his daughters, and an opportunity to become more like our Savior.

I love you sisters!  Hope you have a Happy Halloween! Don’t eat too much candy. ;)

Sincerely, 

Lydia 

Distinct and Different in Happy Ways!

Dear Sisters,

Do you realize how precious you are?  Do you recognize the vital part you play in preparing the world for the second coming of the Lord?  Our lesson today was on Leadership, and I couldn’t help but think of this quote by Elder Packer:

“We need women who are organized and women who can organize. We need women with executive ability who can plan and direct and administer; women who can teach, women who can speak out. …

“We need women with the gift of discernment who can view the trends in the world and detect those that, however popular, are shallow or dangerous.”

Tonight, I would like to echo Elder Nelson’s words from his most recent talk, “A Plea to My Sisters.”  This is a talk I urge each of you to familiarize yourselves with—I would very much like to quote the entire talk… in fact I did, and then I had to painfully edit and re-edit. Brevity is not one of my strong suits.  

He quoted a prophecy President Kimball made over 30 years ago.

“Much of the major growth that is coming to the Church in the last days will come because many of the good women of the world … will be drawn to the Church in large numbers. This will happen to the degree that the women of the Church reflect righteousness and articulateness in their lives and to the degree that the women of the Church are seen as distinct and different—in happy ways—from the women of the world.”

 

Elder Nelson exclaimed that we are the women he foresaw!  Do you think of yourself as distinct and different in happy ways?  I absolutely love that idea and the reminder that we need to stand out and “lighten up.”  The Gospel should be bringing you joy!  

“I wonder if we as Church members might benefit from asking ourselves from time to time: “Is my experience in the Church working for me? Is it bringing me closer to Christ? Is it blessing me and my family with peace and joy as promised in the gospel?” (Elder Uchtdorf)

If we are not feeling joy in the gospel, Elder Uchtdorf urges us to “simply” and “start where we are.” 

“God will take you as you are at this very moment and begin to work with you. All you need is a willing heart, a desire to believe, and trust in the Lord.”

“Today, we need women who know how to make important things happen by their faith and who are courageous defenders of morality and families in a sin-sick world.

 

I pray each of you will do your part to fulfill President Kimball’s prophecy. Elder Nelson promises that as we do, “the Holy Ghost will magnify your influence in an unprecedented way!”

Start where you are!

Sincerely,

Lydia

Oh, how we need each other!

Dear Sisters,

Oh, how I need you! 

Sis. Marjorie P. Hinckley once said, “Oh, how we need each other. Those of us who are old need you who are young. And, hopefully, you who are young need some of us who are old. It is a sociological fact that women need women. We need deep and satisfying and loyal friendships with each other.”

What a blessing your friendships and associations have been in my life already!  I was thinking that this last week, when my daughter interrupted my sleep, yet again, upset from a bad dream.  I had tried several different things to comfort her and get her back to bed, but there she was again, and just as I was about to slip into “angry mom” mode, I remembered an experience Sis. Prawitt had shared in Relief Society about how she was having a hard time getting her son to sleep in his bed, and then she tried playing primary songs, and he went right to sleep.  Her experience gave me an idea.  I know it sounds silly, but I suggested that my daughter sleep with her scriptures.  I didn’t see her again until the next morning, when she told me how much it had helped, but that she didn’t want to bend the pages so she kept them on her night stand, and if she ever felt scared, she could touch them. :)

Long story short, we need each other.  I so appreciate you amazing sisters.  You inspire and lift me.  Your selfless service is so encouraging.  Thank you to the sweet sister who made a thoughtful anonymous gift for my family this last week. 

Sisterhood is such a great blessing, that I hope each of you take advantage of.  (Certainly visiting teaching gives us an opportunity for that.)  I was grateful for Sis. Hughes’s lesson yesterday on the blessings of sisterhood, with the powerful example of Ruth and Naomi.  I also recently read a beautiful talk “Sisterhood, Oh How We Need Eachother.” by Sis. Linda K. Burton.  There were a couple paragraphs I wanted to share:

“The fact of the matter is, we really and truly need each other. Women naturally seek friendship, support, and companionship. We have so much to learn from one another.

Sisters, there is no other group of women in the world who have

access to greater blessings than we do as Latter-day Saint women. We are members of the Lord’s Church, and regardless of our individual circumstances, we can all enjoy the full blessings of priesthood power through keeping the covenants we have made at baptism and in the temple. We have living prophets to lead and teach us, and we enjoy the great gift of the Holy Ghost, which serves as a comfort and guide in our lives. We are blessed to work hand in hand with righteous brothers as we strengthen homes and families. We have access to the strength and power of temple ordinances and so much more.

In addition to enjoying all of these magnificent blessings, we have each other—sisters in the gospel of Jesus Christ. We have been blessed with tender and charitable natures which enable us to render Christlike love and service to those around us. As we look beyond our differences in age, culture, and circumstance to nurture and serve one another, we will be filled with the pure love of Christ and the inspiration which leads us to know when and whom to serve.”

Sisters, I need and appreciate you so much.  I hope we can look beyond differences, and be united through the powerful atonement of Christ.

Have a wonderful week!

Sincerely,

Lydia

Cherish One Another

Sisters,

I'm sending love from Idaho.  I'm enjoying visiting with family, but you are in my thoughts and prayers.  I was sad to miss Kathy Hughes's lesson on Sunday, so I asked if she had a quote she would like to share, and this is what she sent me:

"We must cherish one another, watch over one another, comfort one another, and gain instruction, that we may all sit down in Heaven together." --Lucy Mack Smith

What a wonderful reminder of the special sisterhood we share in this great organization.  In Sis. Hinckley's words, "Oh how we need each other!"  We truly do!  This is why the visiting teaching organization was put in place-- we need to serve and love each other!  I have needed and felt your prayers lately and they have lifted me.  Thank you! 

Sincerely,

Lydia

PS-- I have been reading the Book of Mormon all week and it had given me great strength. Nephi's "I will go and do" attitude is good for me to read about. :)  I hope you are opening that great book EVERY EVERY DAY!!!  Take advantage of those blessings and take up our challenge to read it before Christmas this year.

Growing!

Dear Sisters—

I just can’t wait to get my hands in the dirt after Sis. Garner’s lesson today, and her analogy between sisters in the Relief Society and a garden.  Truly, we need all types!  We are so thankful you are part of our little garden.  She talked about how we need patience, new growing opportunities, blooming where you are planted, and consistent persevering perennials.  I loved how Sis. Salisbury drew the analogy even further by encouraging us to pull out the weeds, or weaknesses and sins in our lives.

Marilyn shared this quote when she talked about our need for patience:

“Too often we approach the gospel like a farmer who places a seed in the ground in the morning and expects corn on the cob by the afternoon. When Alma compared the word of God to a seed, he explained that the seed grows into a fruit-bearing tree gradually, as a result of our “faith, and [our] diligence, and patience, and long-suffering.”  It’s true that some blessings come right away: soon after we plant the seed in our hearts, it begins to swell and sprout and grow, and by this we know that the seed is good. From the very moment we set foot upon the pathway of discipleship, seen and unseen blessings from God begin to attend us.”

Be patient in your growth.  I testify that as you continue to except new opportunities to stretch and grow spiritually, blessings will come.  Be faithful and diligent!  We love you!

-Lydia